Today at work, somehow, we managed to get onto the topic of conversation of who we all thought each other looked like. Somehow everyone managed to arrive at the conclusion that I look like Kurt Cobain. (Which I personally disagree with, but anyway). So then Ms. Superiority, resident bitch at work, had to pipe up […]

Yesterday, as I was catching the escalator out of the train station near my work, I noticed quite a disturbance ahead of me. People ahead of me on the escalator were suddenly reversing their direction and hurrying back down the escalators the wrong way, with looks of terror on their face. And why? Well, it […]

Today I went to the milk bar near my work to get some milk for the office. I had to ask for a receipt, because it was being paid for by my work. When I asked for a receipt, the horribly scary woman behind the counter goes “Oh but only because you’re such a sweetie”. […]

A small coffee incident today. In my office that I work in, we take it in turns to go and buy the coffee for morning tea. It was my turn this morning, and everyone wanted me to go to this new place across the road that specialises in making lasagna. So I bought about […]

Yesterday:
Me: Hey, your hair looks different. Did you do something to it?
Extremely vague female friend: Yes, I made it look different.

At my work (a university) right now, it’s time for students to hand in mid semester essays and do mid semester exams. Since I quit university last year, I’d completely forgotten how clever margin manipulation can turn a 4-page outline into a 100-page essay until I saw some of the students hand in their efforts.
I […]

As predicted, I ate a chicken foccacia with ice cream and tobasco sauce for lunch today.
I made the mistake of watching Entertainment Tonight today, and got all sorts of information I didn’t want to know, like how Pamela Anderson has gotten her breast implants removed. (If you missed it today, don’t worry - it’s […]

I saw Bill Gates on the news tonight demonstrating his new mouse product. (Yes, the state of commercial news broadcasts is sad when a new Microsoft product counts as headline news). I was talking with a friend on the phone this evening about how Bill Gates is saying he’s going to donate 90% of his […]

When I say things like this, it’s no wonder I’m not getting any higher than my current position at work:
Ms Superiority (resident office bitch): *trips over chair and goes hurtling, limbs flailing*
Me: Well, I’ll give you a 9 for style.
Ms Superiority (resident office bitch): *dark, evil, steaming glare*
But Ms Superiority isn’t the biggest bitch at […]

I had a really shit scary dream last night. It’s been a very long time since I had a nightmare that seriously scared me, but I had one last night.
Basically, some bombers came to Melbourne and completely destroyed the place with these giant yellow rays. It suspiscously looked like urine flying everywhere. Hmm. I thought […]

Stupid Products That Really Exist #4052: a snowboard with this year’s AFL fixtures on it. As witnessed in Target by myself.

I’m writing this entry while I am supervising another night school exam at my work (a uni). I feel like a bit of a dill, because I suspected that 2 guys down the back of the room were copying each others’ work. I’d been giving them stern looks all evening (ah, power…) I thought I’d […]

I got off from supervising an exam this evening at my work, although I still had to work a little later than usual. It’s my sole purpose for living at the moment.
I visited the Body Shop on my lunch break today to be confronted with something that haunted me all day. I saw a product […]

Right now I’m working 13 hour shifts at my university - I’m supervising the evening classes’ exams. As you can imagine, sitting there for 3 hours tends to bore you shitless, so while I was sitting there tonight, I wrote down a list of all the little quirks you see the students doing. You know, […]

Sitting on the train today, I noticed someone blow his nose into his tissue, but then he did something I didn’t really expect. He opened his tissue in full view of everyone else to check out the goober he’d snorted out (no doubt giving himself a score out of 10). He probably has a whole […]

At work today, I ventured into the staff lunch room. And then wished I hadn’t. I remembered why I’d been staying away from the place. Every day at lunch time, a certain subculture of the staff at my work huddle together to try and work out the daily general knowledge quiz in the Herald-Sun newspaper. […]

I found out something interesting today. There are heaps of recycling bins in my workplace, and I make extensive use of these. I even walk the extra distance away from my desk so I can be environmentally friendly, and throw my paper in the recycle bin.
I found out something I’m not supposed to know today. […]

Well, my car is still dead, so me and my flatmate had to actually walk to the supermarket today. The 7 minutes almost killed me.
Have you ever noticed when you walk into a supermarket and go to grab one of those red baskets you put your groceries in, that the basket on the top of […]

Right now my car is sitting in my driveway. I’m waiting for it to die.
You see, for some reason, the parking lights won’t turn off. The RACV won’t come out and fix it unless the car won’t start. So I’m being forced to wait until my car’s battery is drained so much that the car […]

It’s Easter. Hence, the acquisition of chocolate eggs, whether you like it or not.
Of course, we all know that Easter chocolate tastes ‘different’. But have you noticed how there’s always somebody that you know that won’t eat their eggs for months on end? Will just leave them there? Someone was talking about this on the […]