Thank You for Thanking Me for My Recent Application
Dear Commission-Hungry Representative,
Thank you for thanking me for my recent application for the position of Customer Service Pleb, which was recently dressed up as a once in a lifetime opportunity on my jobseeker website of choice. Further thanks for having now sent me your whinging standard response twice.
After careful consideration, it is with some measure of reluctance I have to advise that on this particular occasion, you are a bit of a cunt. Whilst I recognise your arse-sniffing skills and experience are relevant to your role, I have also received thank you emails from recruiters whose experience and background more closely match my level of competence.
I know this news will be disappointing and it is in no way a reflection of your skills, experience or background. It merely is due to the fact that you are a cunt.
If you advertise a position in the future that offers a future opportunity for you to verbally defecate all over my resume, please do not hesitate to contact me.
May I take this opportunity to wish you every success in your search for penultimate cuntery.
Yours sincerely,
Random Job Applicant