At the Movies
I’m sick of slowly nodding and sliding into a sly, uneasy, knowing grin whenever someone mentions that something’s “just like that scene in (wildly acclaimed cinematic classic)!”
So here we go: I’m not a movie person.
I’ve never seen any of the Godfather movies. I’ve seen the Star Wars movies once each (and apparently traversed some thin threshold which, for men of my age, is rarely conquered: I displayed vast apathy for the entire saga at large). I’ve never once glimpsed Taxi Driver, Scarface, Citizen Kane, or, ummm… Bambi.
Don’t confuse this with ignorance. I’m simply just not a movie person. Every week, I’ll check what movies are showing, but I’m rarely moved to make a special trip to see a flick.
I’m just not passionate about movies. The Latin term for this condition, apparently, is antipomeranz.
My concern is that this regresses me to some sort of bore. Honestly, I think I more than make up for it with my enthusiasm about bands, but that’s where I begin to grow worried: there’s nothing I can tolerate less than someone who, when quizzed about their preferred genres of music, mutter: “Oh, you know. Everything”. (These people, coincidentally, are almost always triatheletes. Think about it. Ever met a triathelete who didn’t make you want to scream like Jeannie Little out of sheer urban horror?) What if I’m just like these folk, except with movies?
Initially, I was going to plead with you all to recommend an Instant Movie Nerd list. But, honestly, fuck that. My only real free TV time is on the weekends, and that’s when the footy’s on. Oh, and 5.30pm weekdays, but that’s reserved for my Deal or No Deal hypnotic state of gameshow fantacism (seriously, I don’t even remember what happens in my life between 5.30pm and 6.00pm each weeknight).
So remain ignorant of movies I shall remain (note: not a Yoda quote). Everyone has their own little quirks, and this is one of mine, just alongside my unexplainable attraction to the general manager of Big W (causes an escalator jam every time when I’m stuck staring skyward at his beaming face above the entrance to the store, and don’t get off the escalator in time due to my distraction).
And look! It’s Deal or No Deal o’clock right now. Hoorah!

April 27th, 2005 at 6:05 pm
“I’m simply just not a movie person”
So this is what it sounds like when doves cry!
April 27th, 2005 at 8:52 pm
Hurrah! Finally someone who knows as little about movies as I do!
I simply cannot sit there and watch a movie, they usually bore me to tears and if I do get involved I never look into it enough to know which actor is who and who the director is blah blah.
It’s quite bad really, I am a drama student. I should be able to watch movies :P
April 27th, 2005 at 11:08 pm
I can’t say I’m antipomeranz, but the quality of movies is sinking quickly, which means I’m probably antiwilkins. Now all I ever go to the cinema for is movies with Owen Wilson in them and Almodovar films and I only ever buy TV show box sets.
I hate Lord of the Rings with every fibre of my being.
April 27th, 2005 at 11:35 pm
I’m quite the music-nazi, and growing up my sister was the movie-equivalent. She would have a fit whenever I saw a movie and would just say it was “Okay”. Apparently not elaborating is a sin, which I never really understood. I still haven’t seen Grease or Dirty Dancing (gasp!), and hell, I don’t care. Mind you, if I ask someone what genre of music they like or their favourite band, you better come up with something better than “Oh, everything”. So help me god.
April 28th, 2005 at 12:44 am
Here: http://www.livejournal.com/users/ihatemovies/
April 28th, 2005 at 3:24 pm
I dozed off during Lord Of The Bloody Rings. I only woke up when some terrible sprog started screaming its head off at the Orcs or something.
Mind you, the book was a bloody dry read too. Give me The Scarlet Pimpernel or Jackie Chan or I won’t go.
Owen Wilson???
You need help, mikey.
April 29th, 2005 at 12:17 pm
hmmm…. what is it with Big W Managers!? I once had a crush on one when I worked at a regional store. Admittedly, he was probably just attractive by default given the calibre of the patronage.
April 29th, 2005 at 1:26 pm
I really don’t know what to say - I think my heart just broke.
April 30th, 2005 at 6:22 pm
don’t you own a copy of Starsky & Hutch? I’m not surprised you hate movies.
May 1st, 2005 at 11:45 am
1. Oh, thank fuck. I care very little for Star Wars as well. I haven’t seen Scarface of Taxi Driver either. I haven’t seen Silence of the Lambs. But I have seen Bambi.
2. Haha! I made you watch Signs! Ha!
3. Careful. Daniel McPherson used to be a triathlete. Don’t you make fun of my Daniel. Hello, breakfast.
4. Jesus, you too with the Big W thing? Sarah is just as enamoured as you are. Weird. But then, I have previously admitted I wouldn’t kick Ed Phillips out of bed, so who am I to talk?
May 7th, 2005 at 12:17 am
Gargy, can you slaughter Kyle for me? I would seriously pay you cash.
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