So I’ve whittled all the opportunities down to one of the best jobs I can think of: penning the lyrics to teen punk songs. Because really, this job now needs to be outsourced to generate the maximum angst-impact and ensure your music is stolen as much racking up as many sales as possible.

Simple Plan have got this down to a fine art. Then again, it’s not exactly contributing to the cause of pushing the likes of Australian Idol offcuts out of the realm of popular music, is it?

As I preface most of my favourite musical artists: “Embarassingly, I’m a fan of…” the Australian group Insurge. They’re at least politically aware in their lyrics (if not a little tree-hugging), which is a nice bonus to some fairly decent pop-industrial. This was why it came as a complete surprise a few years back to discover that one of the members of Insurge was penning lyrics for Bardot songs (that’s one of the many faceless Popstars winners, in case you’re fortunate enough to have purged them from your memory - myself, I’m not sure which of the senses they offended the most). Which, despite the band’s protestations, doesn’t quite ring with me.

Speaking of not quite ringing with me, that brings me to the subject of Jessica Rowe’s humanity. Let’s face it, she always had shades of Tennews Readerbot, but now she’s Voltron-ised into Happysmile Supermorning Todaygiggle Ninelogowoop Ilovebert Gleecoffeemorning Androidbian. Bitch is getting electrode shocks whenever she stops grinning like a schoolgirl. Who could’ve thought there was something worse than waking up to Sunrise?

This entry was posted on Tuesday, January 31st, 2006 at 8:59 pm and is filed under General. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.